Vid featuring mondo toplessness

This morning over bircher muesli in a local caf, my hubz became quite unfortunately mesmerized by a lady at a neighbouring table’s impressive cleavage bursting forth from her wrap-top like snakes in a can. He swears he wasn’t ogling or being a perve, with eyes remaining stuck for just a moment, dazzled kangaroo-like in headlights, bewitched by the breasts. Unfortunately, the lady who belonged to those breasts picked up on his burning gaze, glared furiously, and it was an awkward moment. Look, we’ve all been there, somehow, some way.

Anyhoo, this isn’t an outing or shaming of my husband’s perviness, nay, it just reminded me of this super clip featuring Russ Meyer imagery cut together with a caveman theme.

Workplace warning: loads and loads and loads of jiggling bare boobage.

Be a woman – Persian Rugs

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Vids featuring bird’s nest hairdos and pointy boots

Last night, we all went to see The Jesus and Mary Chain.

Standing up the back, I held onto the twins in my belly, wondering if they were digging the fuzzy-wuzzy jingly-jangly hurdy-gurdy guitars. Were they thinking (together):

“WOW! We are the coolest kids in town just by the very act of being here and hearing this!”

… like I thought about myself, 19 years ago, in my living room, the first time I saw a Jesus and Mary Chain special on Rage and was in disbelief at the awesomeness that I was certain must have surely been rubbing off on me, too. Like jingly-jangly osmosis.

So last night, I sang along faithfully, cos I knows all the words, and hummed the tunes and bobbed about, minimally. Technically, the performance was faultless. Yet, with the raptures falling well short of what I once felt, back in that living room decorated in the grey and peach soft furnishings inherent to 1989, I finally decided that I much prefer my nostalgia in a can.

And so follows a few vids featuring bird’s nest hairdos and pointy boots.

Blues from a Gun

April Skies

You Trip Me Up



Some Candy Talking

Head On

Far Gone and Out



Just Like Honey

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No More Blank Tapes archive, vol. 2

There’s nothing quite like an end of year round up, so like the veritable Wonder-Woman-lasso-meets-sheep-dog-from-the-hit-animatronic-film-Babe that I am, I’ve fetched and bundled you the No More Blank Tapes archive, vol. 2.

Back in April, when I presented the No More Blank Tapes archive, vol. 1, I had industriously collected 21 themes over 2 and a 1/2 months. Here, in volume 2, I present 11 themes lackadaisically collected over 8 months. Depending on what aspect of my life you’re looking at, that either equals a productivity slump (on You Tube) or boom (in real life). Either way, there’s always a positive out there. Go put your tongue on a 9 v battery and feel that crazy tingle if you don’t believe me.

Merry Christmas.

Vids featuring an enormous sense of disembodiedment-ness

Vids featuring bars

Vid featuring people dressed uniformly

Vids featuring people dancing and posturing around a black-ish room

Vids featuring something reminiscent of Saturday morning TV

Vids featuring a nippy bite to the air

Vids featuring a party

Vids featuring boiler suits

Vids featuring a fluorescent light tube or few

Vids featuring momentum

Vids featuring window furnishings (or not)

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Vids featuring window furnishings (or not)

Over the past week, I’ve been bailing my friends up in bars and droning on about things like window furnishings: curtains? Venetians? Or dare to go bare? I’ve been wondering, at length. Indeed, are venetians only viable if there’s sleazy sax and a hot sex scene in order? Are curtains better if they’re ‘billowing’? Is it fine to forget window furnishings all together, but be keenly aware there might be some dude standing outside looking in at me looking out at him, all the while wearing a t-shirt with a picture my face on it?

And, with all those questions sending my mind ablaze (but not the curtains, thankfully), so follows a few vids featuring window furnishings (or not):

Sans window furnishings

Pyramid – Love of Diagrams

Includes airconditioner.

London in love – I heart Hiroshima

Bamboo roll-down awnings on leftmost window.

Every day is like Sunday – Morrissey

French windows.

Mad world – Tears for Fears

French windows again.

The Killing Moon – Echo and the Bunnymen

More French windows.

Dig for fire – Pixies

A bit glary, could do with a soft net to diffuse the light.

British mode – Goose

Big pretend window, could be a contender as the fourth ‘oblong’ window on Play School. (When given the choice, I always chose the ‘arch’ window over ‘square’ and ‘round’, primarily because I was a steadfastly alternative preschooler.)


Reformation – The Fall

Reformation is my favourite video in a long time.

Lullaby – The Cure

Creep-tastic curtains.

It’s the beat – Simian Mobile Disco

Cartoony curtains.

Heart-shaped box – Nirvana

Curtains in hospital.

Venetian blinds a.k.a. The 1980s music video window furnishing of choice

To look at you – INXS

Dancing with myself – Billy Idol

Kids in America – Kim Wilde

Careless whisper – George Michael

Venetian blinds as eyewear

Stronger – Kanye West

Venetian-blind like louvre shutters

Save a prayer – Duran Duran

And finally, just because I’m thinking about floor furnishings as well, as a bonus:

Flokati rug

Hands remember
– Seabear

This living, breathing flokati rug in all its grubby filth-harbouring hideous glory is precisely why I will never ever have a flokati rug in my house.

(P.S. Seabear make truly lovely videos, but I can’t set a theme around every single one of them. Go search em yourself on You Tube, why don’t ya?)

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Stop right there. A few vids featuring momentum

When I was a young girl, fond of Barbie, Skipper and (begrudgingly) Ken; Strawberry Shortcake; and My Little Pony (particularly for the “hair”, which, incidentally, Ken disappointingly lacked), I thought it’d be wild once I abandoned such folly of saccharine-hued Mattel-dom to some day become a High Powered Executive, largely for all the:

a) Money


b) Way-cool paraphernalia one could display upon their desk. These trophies of the High Powered Executive symbolizing momentum, viz: click-clacking kinetic balls (again, which Ken disappointingly lacked), dizzyingly diving dolphins, tumbling clowns, and Hellraiser-esque beds of pins that meld to the shape of the High Powered Executives despairing cubical-fevered fez.

In fact, by the early-mid 90s, when Geek met Geekette and my then-future huz and I had united, we both spent a lot of time in stores like The Sharper Image, looking for stuff we’d buy for our desks, if only we one day had jobs. Awwww!

HIGHLY ILLUMINATING CAPTION: Michael Douglas (pointing thattaway with what appears to be a cigarette or nub of Play Doh between his fingers. Both still legal in office spaces in 1987) stars as Gordon Gecko in the hit film Wall Street. To not illustrate my point, there are no desk toys here whatsoever, but Chairman Gecko does have resting upon an occasional table something that resembles a Sunbeam waffle iron. Behold!

SOMEHOW, this was all supposed to end with me talking about ‘momentum’, and inventing an on-the-spot homily that will rock your world, viz:

Moving forward is better than moving backward and moving backward is better than not moving at all, aiight.

And so follows a few vids featuring momentum (which, abandoning its correct definition in terms of physics, I’m hereby loosely interpreting as “moving forward”).

Plaster casts of everything Liars


Black gloves Goose

I used to dance with my daddy Datarock

Milkshake – Holy Fuck

Okay, even “momentum as moving forward” is very loosely adopted here. Hell, I just wanted to include a vid featuring the wildness that is a scuba-diving cartoon raccoon.

Icky thump – The White Stripes

Dr. Love – The Bumblebeez

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Vids featuring a fluorescent light tube or few

In much the same way that romance can find rapid fecundity with candlelight, cataracts, and, at a push, a brown paper bag, few things speaketh ‘grim reality’ than a mirror’s reflection back lit by fluorescent light.

Flicker. Flicker.


And so follows a few vids featuring a fluorescent light tube or few.

Tonto Battles

Grinderman – Grinderman

The pretender – Foo Fighters

Lightsabre cocksucking blues Mclusky

So maybe I tricked you. No actual light tube here, but I loves them kittens.

Stronger – Kanye West

I’ve walked down that exact same light-lit staircase the hot chick walks down at A Bathing Ape in Tokyo. And there, alas, our similarity ends.

Boys in town

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Vids featuring boiler suits

You know, I’ve oft been disappointed that I’ve never had a real opportunity to wear a boiler suit.

Furthermore, I’ve oft been disappointed that I’ve never had a real opportunity to wear an inflatable boiler suit in the likeness of Bibendum (or, for those of you who can’t speak French, “The Michelin Man”).

Furthermore to that furthermore, I’ve oft been disappointed that I’ve never been invited to a Bibendum party, whereby all invitees gather together and form a particularly low-impact mosh pit.

True, maybe no one has ever come up with this great idea for an inflatable-boiler-suit-mosh-pit-Michelin-Man party, aside from myself, but it still burns, disappointingly, to not be invited.

The only burning question I’m left with is: if I was invited, and if there was a party, what would we Les Bibendums mosh to?

With that preposition dangling along with my many disappointments, here follows a few vids featuring boiler suits.

Such great heights – The Postal Service

Australia – The Shins

Each life each end Polysics

R U experienced? – Devo

Intergalactic – Beastie Boys

Cars – Gary Numan

Left behind Slipknot


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